Mental Health//

Yes, You Can Be Happy

It helps to listen to your mind and body and respond to the distress calls in time.

Photo by Matthew Hamilton/ Unsplash
Photo by Matthew Hamilton/ Unsplash

We say health is wealth but what is health? Ever defined it for what it means for you? Does mind fall into your definition of health?

When every part of our body is functioning well, we say a person is healthy. We take pride in being health conscious and keep preaching others to be so too. The moment any part of the body shows symptoms of dysfunction, we look for the best doctors and best treatment for ourselves. Be it heart, lungs, kidneys, liver, knees or anything else but mind, we tend to be utmost careful about being caring enough to talk about it and consult with anyone and everyone. Who knows where the best guidance may come from? But what goes wrong when it is about our mind, supposedly the most important part of the body? Mind is one that directs the whole body, all our thoughts and all our emotions as well. It is that crucial. But the irony is that it doesn’t get what it must. And that triggers the journey towards destruction.

There are challenges in this area like our social conditioning and the way we have been brought up, the social taboo of openly talking about mental health, the judgements and the labels that one may get tagged with, which discourage people from addressing their issues and they keep suffering.

As a Life Transformation Coach, I work at the roots of an issue to bring in the transformation. While the whole world today talks about mental health, looking at the experiences with my clients or even thinking as a layman, I realise that people lack awareness to notice the initial symptoms for when they need help for their mind. It’s only when things go out of hand that they are compelled to seek professional help or continue to suffer for life. And hence, I don’t blame people completely. We have not been taught that.

Let me help you understand, it can make it easy for you to notice when your mind needs help. And this is with a consideration to basically prevent than to cure.

Fundamentally, as humans, we are given all it takes to live a happy life.  Happiness is the ultimate mission of human life and it is your birthright. Think about it: why do we do what we do in life? It has happiness as a bottom line. We are given our body and the mind to work together in sync to achieve it. People may debate about whether happiness is a birthright, however, it is the decisions, choices and actions that we make in life that define where we land. That doesn’t change the fundamental intent of the Universe for us.

So when the mission of every life is happiness and that’s what the universe intends to give us, and our mind and body work towards the mission. The basic symptom to notice is when any of them start behaving differently that takes us away from our goal of guaranteed happiness. That’s when the re-tuning needs to be done to keep everything in sync. Easier to notice in case of the body, but tricky in case of the mind.

The hack is simple: Mind, in consideration to its purpose, is there to empower you but when it starts telling you things like — “I am incapable, I am lonely, no one loves me, I don’t think I can do it, I am not worthy, I always fail, life or success is difficult, relationships are complex…” — it is time to re-tune it and ask for help.

Any thoughts or feelings that make you feel weaker and less empowered to be who you want to be is when you need to ask for help.

And this doesn’t necessarily mean professional help. Like when you know the standard of your body functioning, if it falls below, you immediately attend to it, you also need to make your mind function benchmarked to empowering thoughts.

People tend to ignore the initial symptoms when the roots of negativity start getting stronger, the mind starts finding evidence to strengthen it and it becomes too late for us to change the negative beliefs that start manifesting in our life. So it is best to nip the issues in the bud.

Situations may be adverse sometimes, you may not find success at once at what you are doing, you may find some wrong people in life, but understand, it’s a journey and life never guarantees it to be easy. However, what it guarantees is your share of happiness. It is there, so don’t give up. One thing may not work, try the other. It may sometimes not happen in your planned time, be resilient and trust your time. It is a puzzle but there’s a treasure of happiness for everyone. Human life is a gift. One can’t waste it or destroy it because things didn’t work the way expected. Ask for help, for nothing is more important than your happiness, be it people’s opinions or your own ego getting in your way.

Would you ever give up knowing the fact that what you are looking for is surely in store for you? Would you let anything come in your way in achieving it, even if it is your limiting thoughts?

Use your body and mind well. Take care of it in a way you will look after your Ferrari as that is your vehicle that takes you to your desired destination.

Stay conscious enough to catch the slightest symptoms and address them early. Few things that will help:

Eat right and stay physically active: Engage in sports, yoga, workout, running or simply walking as a routine. Do what you enjoy and what works for you. This helps the body and mind sync better.

Have people that you can talk to: It may be different people in different areas of life. Mind it, it’s not the number of people but the quality of people who understand, listen and are there for you, who can pull you up when you are low. Avoid toxic people at all cost because it’s better to be alone than to be in the wrong company.

Practise expressing your thoughts and feelings: Parents too must get their kids comfortable to express from the youngest of age. Give them safety to talk. This will not only help them be aware of their thoughts and feelings but also enable them to express them well. Consult teachers to find ways to do it. Because if they don’t learn it now, they will find it difficult as adults.

Develop habits like reading: Books are the best friends, especially when no one is around. They also help finding answers to life situations and provide motivation to keep going.

Keep a personal journal: Practise writing your thoughts, experiences and feelings. Like a daily diary we use to write in our school days. It has an important meaning. Writing helps us get much more clarity in our own thoughts and is also a way of expression. One feels light after writing things down as one feels after sharing it with someone.

Have your buzz moments daily: Indulge in hobbies/ activities that make you forget time for a while.

Address it before it goes out of hand: Do not hesitate to ask for help — be it from a friend, family, acquaintance or a professional expert.

Would you not try to help anyone who reaches out to you for help? Would you look at a person as  weak for seeking help? Then do not let your ego or any limiting thought stop you from seeking what is must for you. Don’t let anyone’s opinion or social conditioning matter more than your own happiness.

Understand this: You have the right to be happy. Do whatever it takes to be physically and mentally healthy, for any delay may cost you your life.

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People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- Marcus Aurelius

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